My plan was to put a post on Facebook to wish everyone a happy Valentine’s Day. I found an image, decided on the words, got ready to publish … and then stopped, finger poised mid-air.
The problem? My heart just wasn’t in it. I thought about it some more. And some more. And here’s the thing, I’m just not that into Valentine’s Day.
Sorry Valentine. It’s not you. It’s me.
As a painfully shy teenager I dreaded it. Did anyone else suffer the agony of half-hoping a card would arrive from a mystery admirer and instead, and only if you were lucky, open one signed with a big question mark thoughtfully sent by your Mum? At school, friends would compare how many cards they’d received and I’d feel even less attractive and desirable.
And who has been lucky enough to be in a relationship when 14th Feb rocks around, planned the most beautiful, thoughtful, ingenious, romantic gesture – only to find out your partner has either not remembered it was Valentine’s Day or has given you something obviously picked up from the petrol station on the way home. You’re given a sad-looking bunch of wilting flowers that you know cost way too much, or the mixed chocolates on special at the supermarket. However wrong you know it is, it can be difficult not to create expectations and end up feeling disappointed and let down.
I am married for the second time. I didn’t do it very well the first time around and that makes me more determined to appreciate what I have now and try to do better. While I wouldn’t say no to a beautiful gift from my husband, what I really appreciate are all the little every day things he does for me without being asked. Switching on the electric blanket on my side of the bed when it’s cold, pretending he enjoys watching MAFS, folding those infuriating fitted sheets… He speaks to me with kindness, listens to me with interest, treats me with respect.
Every day he shows me his love with his actions and I aim to do the same for him
In my ideal world, we’d celebrate love every day. And not just romantic love, but love for our friends, our children, our colleagues, our homes, our lives, our world! Celebrate special occasions, mark the milestones, make marvellous memories. No matter what day of the week it is.
Let’s start a 30-day challenge today. Every day for the next 30 days, take a few minutes to tell a different person how and why you appreciate them. Do it face-to-face, over the phone, via email, social media, mail – whatever works for you. Let’s share the love.
Every day, not just Valentine’s Day.